Cows are amongst the gentlest of breathing creatures; none show more passionate tenderness to their young when deprived of them; and, in short, I am not ashamed to profess a deep love for these quiet creatures. ~Thomas de Quincey
The cow is of the bovine ilk;
One end is moo, the other, milk.
~Ogden Nash
All the really good ideas I ever had came to me while I was milking a cow. ~Grant Wood
As for butter versus margarine, I trust cows more than chemists. ~Joan Gussow
A cow is a very good animal in the field, but we turn her out of a garden. ~Samuel Johnson
When a cow laughs, does milk come out her nose? ~Author unknown
I guess cows aren’t into the four food groups, especially when they are two of them. ~Anthony Clark
All is not butter that comes from the cow. ~Proverb
Opie, you haven’t finished your milk. We can’t put it back in the cow, you know. ~From The Andy Griffith Show
Condensed milk is wonderful. I don’t see how they can get a cow to sit down on those little cans. ~Fred Allen
The friendly cow, all red and white,
I love with all my heart:
She gives me cream with all her might,
To eat with apple-tart.
~Robert Louis Stevenson
Parties who want milk should not seat themselves on a stool in the middle of the field in hopes that the cow will back up to them. ~Elbert Hubbard
A mind of the caliber of mine cannot derive its nutriment from cows. ~George Bernard Shaw
The cow is nothing but a machine which makes grass fit for us people to eat. ~John McNulty
Never kick a cow chip on a hot day. ~Proverb
Who was the first guy that look at a cow and said, “I think that I’ll drink whatever comes out of those things when I squeeze them?” ~Bill Watterson
Milk the cow, but do not pull off the udder. ~Greek proverb
If happiness truly consisted in physical ease and freedom from care, then the happiest individual would not be either a man or a woman; it would be, I think, an American cow. ~William Lyon Phelps
The human body has no more need for cows’ milk than it does for dogs’ milk, horses’ milk, or giraffes’ milk. ~Michael Klaper
Scoops of mint ice cream with chips of chocolate cows. ~Jim Bishop, “On the English Countryside,” NY Journal-American, 1957 September 28th, quoted in Simpson’s Contemporary Quotations compiled by James B. Simpson
Tongue — a variety of meat, rarely served because it clearly crosses the line between a cut of beef and a piece of a dead cow. ~Bob Ekstrom
I’d rather kiss a mad cow on the muzzle than a smoker on the mouth. ~Paul Carvel
I go about looking at horses and cattle. They eat grass, make love, work when they have to, bear their young. I am sick with envy of them. ~Sherwood Anderson
To laugh is human but to moo is bovine. ~Author unknown
There’s nothing like sitting back and talking to your cows. ~Russell Crowe
There’s something about getting up at 5 a.m., feeding the stock and chickens, and milking a couple of cows before breakfast that gives you a lifelong respect for the price of butter and eggs. ~Bill Vaughan
I write in order to attain that feeling of tension relieved and function achieved which a cow enjoys on giving milk. ~H.L. Mencken
Custard: A detestable substance produced by a malevolent conspiracy of the hen, the cow, and the cook. ~Ambrose Bierce
Greatness alone is not enough, or the cow would outrun the hare. ~Proverb
Expecting the world to treat you fairly because you are good is like expecting the bull not to charge because you are a vegetarian. ~Dennis Wholey
The mere brute pleasure of reading — the sort of pleasure a cow must have in grazing. ~Lord Chesterfield
